CHIT CHAAT: Halloween humour

What is Halloween Desi Style? Here are 10 ways you can tell that you are trick-or-treating at a Desi’s house. (The following is written for entertainment purposes only, and is in no way intended to be offensive.)

 1.      As you approach the driveway, you will notice the lingering smell of turdka.

2.      You will walk past at least four vehicles parked in the driveway, one of which will be a minivan.  And even in the dark you will be able to see the glistening silver kanda hanging from one of the rearview mirrors.

3.      There will be no Halloween decorations adorning the yard or door. (But it’s another thing that the inside may look like Christmas threw up on it, with the tacky decor and ornaments. But that’s a whole other blog lol.)

4.      It will take a few minutes for someone to open the door as they can’t hear the doorbell over the natakh that is playing full blast and has all the adults glued to the set.

5.      Finally a bibi will open the door to hand out candy but once she realizes you are Desi too, she won’t let you leave until you tell her what pind you are from. And if she likes your answer, she will give you extra candy.

6.      The candy that you receive from a Desi person’s home will be comprised mostly of peanuts, sticky lollipops and hard caramel toffee.

7.      Leaving the house,  you will notice that even the older kids from the Desi home are getting ready to go trick-or-treating as it is free candy and all Desi’s love free.

8.      You will also notice that Desi kid costumes are usually not store-bought as that’s a waste of money. Kids are encouraged to use free things from home to make their costumes and mom’s suits and sarees are acceptable options.

9.      If you show up to a Desi household around 7 p.m. you are late, as you will notice that their candy has already run out and the lights are now turned off.

10.   After 8 p.m. the Desi household is back in business to hand out candy as they just got back from Superstore where they bought leftover Halloween candy at 50% off.

And that concludes our tale of Desi Ishstyle Halloween.

Translations for the non-Desi’s:

Turdka – The base of most Indian dishes; includes pungent ingredients such as garlic, ginger and onions
Kanda – A symbol or emblem of the Sikh faith
Natakh – An Indian soap opera
Bibi – An elderly Sikh woman
Pind – Village in India

Sangeeta Kaila is a writer for Vancouver Desi. For decorating ideas for the home, office, events or wardrobe, contact Posh Planners.

Pete says:

October 17, 2012 at 9:32 am

And a last thing . . . the usual reply is that “white people were immigrants too”. Yeah but Canada was not a country when the first European settlers came here. Notwithstanding the native issue, through blood and sweat they created a country that made you or your parents want to come here. So if it means swallowing some ego, so be it, but you should respect the great country that has allowed you to create a life here.

greg says:

October 17, 2012 at 12:30 pm

we ddidnt creat nothing alone we slaved asians and indians to do it, pete u know jack.
more i read your comments morei see rasism, hate, jelousy, insecurity, sorry to break your evil heart but thacanada u had is not that anymore its multicultural with rules from all over the world. it will change more & more every year. you might wanna move back to europe bro

Ray says:

October 17, 2012 at 7:40 pm

Pete If you are going to dissect every little detail on this site. I would suggest you take a look at the name of the website It’s called Desi for a reason. Everyone is just expressing a perspective they have. No one is targeting a particular race or trying to insult a culture. It’s a fun sight for all readers.

max says:

October 17, 2012 at 8:58 pm

thx Ray, this guys an embarrasment to us, jesus

Raj says:

October 16, 2012 at 4:25 pm

To be perfectly honest as a “Desi” I don’t find this post humorous but rather offensive. Particularly the reference to a khandha, because not all desi’s are Sikh and the khandha is a Sikh symbol. I was hoping this site would be a platform to promote the positives within our community and would like to see that reflected in future posts.

I think humor like this is quite subjective and I’m sure some people will appreciate it. For me, it’s the wrong use for a journalistic platform.

mandeep says:

October 16, 2012 at 7:33 pm

hmmmu got a point, i wonder if kaila knows what ik onkar means or the kanda without googling it lol.but its ok, alot better then racist comments from mr. nazi…. as in this jedd guy all over this site

Pete says:

October 17, 2012 at 9:27 am

Raj,

You’ve also just answered part of your question. You identify yourself as a Desi not as a Canadian – or at least as Desi first. So how can Canada create or maintain an identity if people that come to Canada think of themselves as something else first?

I view myself as a Canadian. Not a hyphenated version of my heritage. Not as part of my religious background. Just purely as a Canadian through and through.

Why can’t people that come here think the same thing? Why do they need or desire to have their own subsection of society just for them? Ask yourself why that is important to you and how that affects your view on the rest of Canada. It creates disjointed communities that all celebrate their differences from the rest of society. People come here and just set up shop and live as they had in their homeland.

Pete says:

October 17, 2012 at 9:30 am

This is why we have friction. People come here and think they can continue as they had in their homeland without any respect to their new country. This isn’t India or Pakistan or whatever so you may not be able to do everything you had done in your homeland. And that’s a good thing . . . otherwise Canada would have all the problems that made you or your parents leave your country. Why can’t people see that?

KJ Kaila says:

October 16, 2012 at 11:36 am

Offensively hilarious! Love the comedy on some of these blogs and nice to see personality instead of just stories. Keep it up. KJ

Jeff says:

October 16, 2012 at 10:17 am

When you don’t have anything valid to say you can always pull the race card. It’s just that easy.

greg says:

October 16, 2012 at 3:17 pm

oh jeff stop giving us white canadians a bad name, go back to your 20 person army the kkk

greg says:

October 15, 2012 at 8:36 pm

hey guys im sorry for jeff hes my racist white cousin always commenting on this website lolo